Proverbs 11:22 "As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion."
I have realized for some time this is a principle that I need to work on something terrible. Being someone who finds most often that when I get frustrated I need a sounding board in order to vent and gain better perspective on the situations that leave me in such a bind to begin with. There are some people and places that are not the wisest ones in which to release the slue of verbal arsenal in my armory. What starts as venting in order to keep from exploding at the wrong moment becomes gossip in the blink of an eye and a person has no business airing dirty laundry in front of others that have no business knowing it.
I realize, and i hope others do also, that it isn't that I find myself better than others or that I am judging them but everyone has a way of dealing with stressful situations. I am one who finds that going to a third party in confidence is a helpful way of doing that. Unfortunately, I have also noticed that my third party has turned into a third and then a forth and then sometimes even a fifth party. That's when it's no longer venting but it is gossiping and it's even worse when those parties are all together in the same room and I'm talking in a loud voice. I've had to apologize more than once for bad form or whatever you want to call it.
Those that have known me for years know that most of it I don't even mean, it's just my way of dealing with it and most of the time all that is needed for them to do is nod and say "I understand..." on occasion. Most often once I hear myself say it out loud I can see the right thing to do. Sometimes it's that I am the one in the wrong and I need to change my reaction or mindset or attitude; sometimes I see that it's stupid that I allowed it to bother me to begin with and sometimes there may not be anything that can be done about the situation and it just helps to voice it.
Going back to this verse though... this is exactly what it's talking about. Discretion is part of having self-control and good judgment and it's not just over what you say, though that is the area being addressed here. Coming from the book in the Bible known as the book of wisdom, it's safe to say this is a good piece of advice. I realize I'm really dumbing this down but I do have a point. From whom do we gain this wisdom and knowledge? From the Lord, of course. The book of Proverbs is only one place that is crammed full of the wisdom of God for our gleaning and if there is one "third party" that I need to be talking more to about my frustrations it's the Lord. He is the one that will give answers and wisdom and correction. He is the one who understands fully what we go through in life and He is the one that can change things or better yet, change me so that I can follow in His will as He would have me do. I do not want to be a beautiful jewel for the Lord in the nasty, dirty nose of a pig.
This is my point though, I send out a big "I'm sorry" to all those who have had to hear my venting when I did not use my better judgment on timing and surroundings. I hope you can forgive me. I also send out a big one to those whom my frustration turned into gossip, though I wont address anyone specifically on account that I don't think it would be smart to do that in a post online. It is my prayer that the Lord would continue to point out this short coming in me that through Him I would gain the victory and claim this verse for myself; that I might write God's Word upon my heart that I might not sin.